Comfort - When spouses need comfort...

“Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” Romans 12:15

The definition of comfort is “to soothe, console, reassure, bring cheer to, to aid, to support or encourage.” (dictionary.com)  The perfect example of comfort comes from Christ.  He has extended His comfort to us unconditionally with no strings attached.  That comfort is shown in 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 “Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts and establish them in every good work and word.”  If Christ is the perfect example of comfort, then it is important to turn to scripture to see how He comforts so we know how to comfort.  

Romans 12:15 – “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”  If one takes a look at Christ’s life, He shared in peoples’ joy as well as wept when others wept.  When Jesus’ friend Lazarus died, He wept with Lazarus’ sisters even though He knew Lazarus was going to be raised from the dead.  He truly felt their pain.  Comfort is truly feeling for your spouse.  We may not know exactly how they feel, but we can extend to them comfort in a way to let them know we hurt when they hurt and rejoice when they rejoice.

That concept leads into 2 Corinthians 1:3-4. “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”  Christ extends us His comfort in all afflictions.  We are able to feel and know His comfort because we have an ongoing relationship with Him.  We have an ongoing relationship with our spouse.  To be able to extend the comfort our spouse needs it is imperative to continue to build the relationship with each other; to understand what kind of comfort is needed.

In Isaiah 40:1 it notes how God has comforted.  “Comfort, comfort my people, says your God.  Speak tenderly to Jerusalem…”  Even though Jerusalem didn’t deserve tender words, they were comforted by the Lord’s tender speaking.  We too can extend comfort by using tender words.  Many times our spouses endure the harshest words because it is easy to “unload” on them when times of comfort are needed.  Tender words in reply are a way to demonstrate love and dedication. 

Finally, in Psalm 23:4 it states, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”  We have the comfort that Christ is with us.  Married couples need to have the comfort that they are there for each other despite what is being thrown at them at any given time.  Christ will never leave us!  We say for better or for worse.

Comfort is something each of us needs from one another.  It was pointed out in 2 Corinthians we are able to extend comfort because He has given us comfort.  As you continue to grow with your spouse and learn how your spouse needs comfort, you will be able to extend it because we have the perfect example through Christ.

Cheryl