Respect

As noted in an earlier blog post I send out marriage reflections to couples each week.  One week we looked at the word respect and the importance of giving respect in marriage.

Respect

“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.” Philippians 2:3

Respect is one of those attributes that is highly regarded as well as many times highly misused.  Many people have “earned” the respect deserved and others just expect the respect to be there.  A marriage where respect is expected but the actions show otherwise from one or both spouses is a marriage that is missing out on the beauty of respect.  It is a marriage missing out on the beauty of a deep connection with one another.

The definition of respect according to dictionary.com is…

“Esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability.”

Do you hold and see your spouse in esteem and in excellence?  Do your actions make it easy for your spouse to hold you in esteem and excellence?

In looking through different materials about respect, I believe there are levels of respect.  One level of respect is what I will call automatic.  You respect each other because you are married to each other.  That should be an automatic.  Ephesians 5:33b states, “The wife must respect her husband.”  Romans 12:10 notes, “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.  Honor one another above yourselves.”  It is respecting one another because you have made a commitment to one another.

The levels of respect beyond “automatic” are what I would call “earned”.  As you grow in your marriage, you discover one another.  You discover what makes each other tick.  You discover what is okay with your spouse and what isn’t.  As you make discoveries about your spouse you have learned new ways to respect them. 

As you go about your week find ways to show respect to your spouse.  By showing them respect, you are taking the time to honor them as well.

Cheryl